Tuesday, June 04, 2013

The One-Track Mind



When my little brother was young (now he's old and foot taller than me), my parents always used to complain that he had a one-track mind. At 4 or 5 years old, he would get on an issue and absolutely not let it go until I wasn't sure if mom and dad were going to kill him or themselves.  I'm not sure if his one-track mind was just that much more prominent than mine or if it's only been in my later life that I've developed my own one-track mind skills.  But, either way, I have definitely hit my stride.

Typically, my single-mindedness has surrounded technology.  The smallest inkling I need something, quickly turns into a full blown obsession. First I have to give it a lot of discussion and thought, weighing whether or not I really need the thing.  But needing something is so subjective, I usually make it past that stage and on to the justification of why I need it.

Then comes the shopping, price-comparing, and bargain hunting...followed by another strong dose of justification. Once I actually order the item, the obsession turns to tediously watching my email for order updates, shipping notifications, and tracking information.  Tracking the package is an art all its own, the details of which are beyond the scope of this article.  

All aspects of this process, from my first sentence of, "Hey, I wonder if I should get a ..." to my ceremonious opening of the package and meticulous reading of the owners manual, drives The Pastor nuts.  However, over the past few years, this model has served me well.  Usually, beginning at the discussion phase, The Pastor is already so sick of hearing about it, he comes forth with "Just go buy the dumb thing already, will ya!"  This helps speed things along, as it cuts down the justification phase a bit.

 But last week I sunk to a new low. My one-track mind focused not on a new computer gadget, not on a trendy decoration for our house, or a even a new espresso machine.  The subject of my all encompassing thoughts...cheese.  Costco was sampling Dubliner Irish Cheese and I made the mistake of trying a piece.  It was an awesome mouthful of cheesiness.  But, the thirteen bucks they wanted for a brick of it put me squarely over my budget.  I denied myself the cheese.  But all week long, I found myself craving it.  I couldn't stop thinking about that stupid cheese.  So much so, that I had to make an extra trip to Costo (which is 40 minutes away) just to go get it the next weekend.

By my latest calculations, I spent $32.47 to get that cheese, and I have gained eight pounds in three days eating it.  Maybe I should have spent just a little more time deciding if I really needed it. Maybe I should just start making my own cheese.  Ooh, maybe I should get a.... nah.


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